so i see... huh... now i know what i've been pondering on all this time... i feel so stupid for not realizing it earlier... well here it goes.

all this time what i haven't realized is how good of friends i have.  I've never had anyone pick on me since some time... and if there was, my friends have always been there.  all you guys... thanks again... its my realization that you friends are really all i need.  love is for fools... i was a fool... and i still may be... but i'll fix that soon enough.  this... will seriously be my last entry... so with this.. i will take all the advice of my friends... here goes. 

To brittany:  I'm sorry bout everything with the blog ring and all this shit on xanga.  from here i'm going to take everything off.  I did love you... but i guess it wasn't meant to be *or stay*...  but yea.  i'll withdraw from that blog ring. and i'll tell you i'm sorry again. this is it.

all you guys who've ever been there to get me outta some problem... thanks alot i still owe you guys.  so... with this i'm gone... as my final...

Laters

this... is my explanation of what it means to be a friend, family, or just a cool guy... this explanation is response to scott... the real acid.

Peers are those that i mess around with in public.  they almost always end up turning down any personal favor you ask them... but take those that seem reasonable on their terms.  people like this... would be zach, mario, john, jaren, and basicly all my friends at brians.

friends are those who you can fall on if you ever need an ear.. shoulder... or a voice.  they dont' always take your requests... but they do when they believe they should.   friends like meghan, scott, chris, korean chris, kenson, and new found friends amy and andrew... you are these people... nothing more, and nothing less.  Don't take this as an insult.

family are those who will always be there wheather day or night.  they are... what ever you ask them to be.  They will always be there... and they will always take your request... no matter how harsh on another it is.  the person i concider my true family... my brother... not even asian... lol... mychal calivo.  always been there... and takes my side with almost no question.  don't feel bad scott.  mychal has been concidered family since 8th grade... one year after i met him in band *this sounds like i'm gay... i'm not.. dont' even leave that comment.  mychal is my bro* any time i've ever needed something... he never complained while on doing it... hes almost always done it.  realize though these are the things that i asked him to do... lets launch a few examples.  during my last relationship... a friend meghan asked me to hook her up with mychal.  i asked... and in some what a few minutes he accepted... a day later they started going out.  next example... meghan asked mychal to take brit to the band banquet... *when we were still going out* and he refused.  about an hour later... i asked and he accepted... with seemingly no sign of a complaint... thats family.  hes always been there.  those that are close... are those who believe my side is the more worthy ones... the ones who joined my very own anti-brittany harada blog ring.  lori and nikki... thanks alot... i owe u guys... i owe you guys big.  this is what it means to be family... family is always there because they feel they always have to be there.  they do things even if they don't want... some times they complain some times they don't.  this is what it means... well.. since i don't have many... lets list these members *they are in no sort of order* : mychal, lori, nikki, and chelsea.  some others possible could be: ryan, casey, danton... haven't talked in to long... so i'm not sure if they're the same.

thats it... i just felt like saying.

Edit

haha... mai bad mychal. dont' tease us mid pac people with limited knoledge! yup yup... laters

arite... i'm ok... i must apologize for those past few entries... i was not myself...  you could say i snapped but hey... wutever... well i'm just mad because she left me the way she did... not a word from her... no good bye... no i'm sorry... nothing... and on top of it she TELLS her friend to tell me... after i found out what the specific details where... i realized i cried for nothing... i snapped you could say... but who wouldn't? she did the same thing that supposedly jon and andrew did to her... you'd think she'd atleast tell me sorry or something... but no... instead she did nothing... she just left me... just dumped me on the street on my own... all that i loved her... its all hate... she lied... she betrayed... i swear... i'll never understand chicks... i'll never love again... its just not worth it... *sigh*... again i shall apologize for the previous entries... i just couldn't believe it happened....

laters...

haha... i lied... sorry that wasn't my last entry... i had to find something first... song lyrics dedicated to she which i fucking hate... and here they are...

Where Did Our Love Go
The Supremes
(Brian Holland/Lamont Dozier/Edward Holland, Jr.)

Baby, baby
Baby don't leave me
Ooh, please don't leave me
All by myself

I've got this burning, burning
Yearning feelin' inside me
Ooh, deep inside me
And it hurts so bad

You came into my heart
So tenderly
With a burning love
That stings like a bee

Now that I surrender
So helplessly
You now wanna leave
Ooh, you wanna leave me

Ooh, baby, baby
Where did our love go?
Ooh, don't you want me
Don't you want me no more

Ooh, baby
Baby, baby
Where did our love go
And all your promisses
Of a love forever more

I've got this burning, burning
Yearning feelin' inside me
Ooh, deep inside me
And it hurts so bad

Before you won my heart
You were a perfect guy
But now that you got me
You wanna leave me behind
Baby, baby, ooh baby

Baby, baby don't leave me
Ooh, please don't leave me
All by myself

Ooh, baby, baby
Where did our love go?

this is fucking exactly what happened... you fucking left me... you fucking lied to me... fucking bitch... you DIDN"T EVEN FUCKING SAY GOOD BYE  FUCKING SICK FUCKING SLUT!! FUCKING WHORE!! FUCKING BITCH!!!

Sorry all... but this will be my last entry... this xanga was earlier dedicated to someone i held dearly... someone i did anything and everything i could for... this entry will all be dedicated to that i thought would never leave me... here it goes

this brittany is about you... is about all your lies to me... every last one... your happier now right? i certainly fucking hope so...  you fucking droped me for a rock... while i was fucking waiting for you too... you'll never find someone that'll make you as happy as i can huh? You'll fucking never leave me huh? you don't fucking want to get hurt by something like what andrew and jon did to you huh?  guess what? you fucking did the same thing they fucking did to you to me... you fucking told me not to wait because you found someone better... you fucking bitch... what  fucking bullshit lies... ALL FUCKING LIES!!! understand this... i've told you this one bitch... you fucking stay away from me... the fucking next time i see you i will fucking kill you... you fucking stay the fuck outta my life... this is my fucking last warning... dont' ever fucking speak to me again... I dont' want to hear your fucking lying voice... you fucking bitch... I fucking got rid of everything... this xanga no longer has you as a part of it... it never fucking will again... and dont' worry too... i wont' fucking break my promise... i won't fucking kill myself... BUT I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU IF YOU FUCKING EVER TRY TO BE MY FRIEND AGAIN.  I'LL NEVER BE YOUR FRIEND EVER AGAIN. UNDERSTAND? FUCKING BITCH.... I FUCKING CRYIED FOR YOU... NOT EVEN CHELSEA WAS CAPABLE OF CAUSING ME THIS MUCH FUCKING PAIN... I'M IN FUCKING AGONY RIGHT NOW!!! I SWEAR... THIS IS IT... CHELSEA IS MY FRIEND NOW! YOU'LL FUCKING NEVER BE... I FUCKING SWEAR... YOUR FUCKING LUCKY I DON'T FEEL LIKE HUNTING YOU DOWN AND FUCKING MURDERING UR ASS ON THE FUCKING SIDEWALK... i'm fucking crying... and because of what you've made me feel nothing will ever stop this feeling... YOU FUCKING HEAR? NOTHING!! AND ITS ALL YOUR FUCKING FAULT... you fucking know what? i hope you fucking read this you fucking bitch.... FUCKING WHORE!!  you might as well be the fucking slut i thought you were earlier... acctually wait... your not even worth that... your everyone fucking ho!  that sounds like a more fucking worthy title for you... I hope you fucking kill yourself over this... or wait... maybe you wont'... you probably dont' even give a shit about me anymore do you? thats fucking right... you don't... just so you fucking know... this entry will never change or come down... it'll stay up DEDICATED TO YOU! THE FUCKING BITCH THAT PLAYED ME!!  i hope you fucking get played or raped one of these fucking days... i really fucking hope it... i'll fucking even start believing in god if i have to... just to pray for it... just for you bitch... understand?  I dont' even know why i fucking bother to cry... your not worth my fucking tears.... you really aren't...  just a fucking loser bitch... you dont' even deserve to die... you deserve to live and be fucking killed... to have fucking blood drained outta you drop by fucking drop.... till you fucking die...

story of andrew and brittany *according to brittany... fucking bitch*  basicly they both decide to break up, some how he tells her to wait for him... that he'll come back to her... and a few days later, a friend of andrew tells her he said to stop waiting... then she finds out andrews going out with amy... then she hates him...

Now... my story... *according to me... and i wont' fucking lie about this.* the relationship is going shitty as it is and brittany has her doubts... so she tells me she needs some time apart to think... she also says and pleads me to wait for her... reluctantly i wait... 1 or 2 days after she says... i make up my mind... and tell her i'll wait... as long as it wont' take over 1 month... so she tells me... then i shouldn't wait... i convincer her i will so everything seems fine... next day... she says stop waiting for her... and doesnt' tell me why... on today *saturday* meghan (brittanys friend) sends me 2 txt messages... that says... "brittany found another person and shes happy with him... i'm sorry to be the one to tell you this"  I wasn't fucking sorry... i fucking cried when i saw that... i couldnt' even fucking believe it... what makes it better is... i was the last to know... out of all my friends... great... fucking great...

so... tell me... whats the difference between these two storys? guess what? there is none... and brittany told me that she was afraid that this was going to happen to her in our relationship...  and i promised it wouldn't.... too bad... guess i was to stupid to ask her for the same promise.... guess its my fault then huh? even if it is... i'll fucking make her pay for this... the next time i see her i swear... i can't even say what i'll do to her... i wont'... i fucking swear... fucking bitch...

YOU STAY THE FUCK OUTTA MY LIFE... GET IT?

so fucking funny... i've edited this over 3 times because i can keep thinking of more reasons to hate you...

*edit*  4 TIMES!! 4 FUCKING TIMES!! still counting!